Diamond Dallas Page: I like me. You like me. And I'm going to help you, like you, to be more like me, DDP. And that's a GOOD thing!
Diamond Dallas Page: It's a match made in heaven, DDP heaven. Time for the Heart Attack Kid and Joke Hogan to get back into the ring, and that's a BAD thing. I get to prove myself to the whole XIWA as the real thing, with the one and only Double J, the Chosen One. And that's a GOOD thing!
Diamond Dallas Page: You see, after Jarrett and I pummel you two to death, you are going to have to visit the ER. You will be in so much pain, you will need to retire AGAIN, and that's a BAD thing. On the other hand, you will be able to enjoy watching myself and Jarrett win future matches from the comfort of your own living rooms! And that, my friends, is a GOOD thing!
Camera pans out to see Kimberly.
Kimberly Page: You know what Diamond? I'm sick of Miss Pixie sticking her nose in where it doesn't belong. Not to mention that good for nothing Gator-bait reject distracting She-man Chyna from me keeping MY Women's title. Believe you me, as Commissioner of the XIWA, I won't stand for such interference. So, in all my powers, I am making a match for an upcoming Carnage. A Triple Threat match for the women's title. And I will be the guest referee, and that's a GOOD thing.
Diamond Dallas Page: Whom ever is going to be in that Triple Threat match will be living a BAD thing. But Kimberly as the guest referee will be a GOOD thing. But Kimberly, who will be in this Triple Threat match?
Kimberly Page: The Triple Threat match will involve the so-called champion, Hunter, squaring off against Miss Pixie and none other than that southern trailer-park ho, Gator.
Diamond Dallas Page: Get in Kimbery's way girls and you will feel a BAD thing happen. That would be a big BANG from DDP, which would be a GOOD thing, for me, DDP...
Kimberly Page: Oh, and Wolf-maxi-pac, pull another stunt like last Carnage, and you'll be READING about XIWA in your local unemployment line. And that would be a BAD thing... But being DDP and Kimberly, is definitely a GOOD thing... BANG!!!